And in the darkest nights, if my memory served me right, I will never turn back time, forgetting you but not the time... (whatsername by Green Day)
Time is like a dandelion seed, no, a thousand dandelion seeds in an open field, and when you chased one among the rest, you can't grasp it. It just flies away. An abundance of time means time is leaking.
And everyone is gone, it seems like I am in a lonely world, no voice, no shout, no laughter, just silence. My eyes turn to peer into the cloud-streaked sky, head resting on a pillow, in the balcony.
I am just tired, just wanna rust,no, that's for metals, rot away, both being catabolic reaction. Something that changes in time to come. But can I control the changes? Will the change be negative? My thoughts wandered off further and further, until I thought about something random.
I just read Darren Shiau's Heartland and it's fantastic. It gives you a kaleidoscope to look into Singapore, and the various texts describing the usual scenes of daily life of Singaporeans- the diminishing wet markets, the hawker centres too, and everywhere else in singapore explained in detail. the characters too, are surreal. It would be a good novel to explore for learning of literature and english. guarantee an A for english.
Talking about A, I still haven't recovered from the hellish feelings of the O levels yet. The more people/ relatives asking, '' So how's your O levels?'', the more I thought about that epic moment of time. Horrible. 82 kg. pimples. mugging. In self-deceit or more postively, self-assurance, my reply would be,'' So-so lor. It's over already. Waiting for results.'' accompanied by dazed eyes to bore the asker/s and prevent them from further query. Deep in my mind/ stomach, I would feel the anticipation, cum the paranoid feeling everyone would face in the Long Wait. The O level post-Blues I would say.
I am quite worried for my language and humanities, for they were the hardest in the century. I bet you. The sciences, on the other hand, were the normal chicken feed kind, I would say. Sometimes I really blame the syllabus and myself for the O levels. This feeling of uncertaincy has never been so great.
On the bright/greener side, this Long Wait would be spent happily, freely without any burden. I would turn back and become a kampung boy again, as I was before, the innocent and very gullible one. The knowledge and memories and experiences I have had would turn solid into photographs and yearbooks. No soft copy.
Before I start JC in february, let me spend some time living primitively before I go back to the hectic life. Cherish this moment, for it may or may not come again. My own time to fix my life, to exercise, to polish my flirting skills, to regain the leadership I have had, to build up my Scouting skills ( all forgotten and I even forgot how to tie a Square lash), and strengthen my relationships(it was getting looser and further apart everytime) with everyone I know. Maybe adopt a more humble attitude and an open mind. Myself.
I am really curious how many people read my blog. Here, I admit, I am an avid silent reader of blogs, bloghopping in midnight in the blogosphere. Most of the time I read girls' blogs, for most guys do not have any, or is too boring, as ther daily posts would start with, "Today I went to play basketball. " and "Today I went to play basketball. " and "Today I went to play basketball.'' and "Today I went to play basketball. " I like the near perfect nicely done up ones like Frederika's and yan ping's and peek into their daily lives and thoughts they weave with time.
Downloaded wolfteam and played for a while. I am always the feeder. Then one day one guy wrote to me. Do you want to be a hucker? (hacker)
For a moment thought he was a gay, but sometime I realised that he wanted me to join his hacking team. I said no.
Huck sounds much nicer, and funnier, like one person swearing the word Fuck! and at the same time have a very sore throat, or half a voicebox removed, or sneezing at the same time. Or hiccuping.
Huck you, you hucking moron, hucked up.
Hucked up beyond all recognition (HUBAR)
What am I talking now? okay,back to the track. I would like to know how many people read my blog. Fully. Please TAG to acknowledge yourselves behind the computer screen, so that I know that you are a regular reader. Then the 2 most unique tags wins $5 from me. Five Hucking Dollars for you to grab!
adieus.
